In an increasingly isolated world, it's easy to find belonging and connection. Just show up

Since the advent of television, a profound transformation has quietly unfolded across the United States: the increasing privatization of "free time."

Americans -- once defined by their commitment to local organizations, churches and civic life -- have seen that participation decline by every conceivable measure since the mid-20th century.

Is it any wonder, then, that only 23% of Americans feel that most people can be trusted?

In 2025, we are more digitally connected than ever but have never felt more alone. Americans spend, on average, six or more hours per day on digital media, yet are some of the least likely globally to feel close to others in their country or community. Digital platforms provide unprecedented access to information and virtual interaction, but they often serve as a substitute, rather than a supplement, to real-world engagement. Public spaces that once served as "third places" -- informal socialization spots like cafés, parks, and community centers -- are increasingly abandoned in favor of digital spaces that fail to provide the same depth of social interaction.

The result? A nation of isolated individuals, "connected" through screens but disengaged from the people around them.

In 2023, Surgeon General Vivek Murthy declared loneliness a public health crisis, warning that social disconnection poses greater risks to individual health than heavy smoking, excessive alcohol consumption, and obesity. A lack of community engagement isn't just bad for society -- it's also affecting individual health and happiness.

How do we mend the fraying social fabric of American society, and prevent the loss of American lives? The solution, at its core, is simply showing up. To increase our social capital and rebuild our communities, we must choose to engage, interact and say "yes" to the real people around us -- rather than defaulting to nights alone with our phones. Civic groups, churches, and non-profit organizations are eager to welcome your involvement, or you can try what I did: start your own.

Five years ago, in the middle of the COVID-19 pandemic, my family moved to Utah. With two young children and a world shut down, my mental health deteriorated, and I struggled to feel like myself. When pandemic conditions improved, it occurred to me that I had stopped doing what I loved: playing volleyball. After failing to find a local team, I decided to start my own.

I received permission to use the church gym on Wednesday nights, posted an invitation to a community Facebook page and hoped for the best. The response was slow at first, but within a few months, we had a full court. Word spread, and within a few years, we outgrew the space.

What began as a chance to exercise and break out of the dishes-and-diapers routine became something far more meaningful: a community. In between serves, strangers became friends, lifting one another in triumph and in hardship. It wasn't just volleyball that kept us coming back. It was something that many American communities are missing -- a sense of true belonging.

The volleyball court taught me that meaningful connection doesn't require grand gestures. It just requires presence. You can build community even if you're tired, busy or can only give an hour. What matters is showing up, again and again.

Nervous to put yourself out there? Start small. Even short social interactions with strangers at the store or other "third places" can improve overall well-being. Incredibly, these interactions create a short-term boost in happiness for both the person initiating and the person receiving. Our diverse, modern democracy depends on this "bridging" social capital.

As new threads of social connection bind America back together, our individual and collective health will improve. The surgeon general warned, "If we fail to do so . . . we will continue to splinter and divide until we can no longer stand as a community or a country. Instead of coming together to take on the great challenges before us, we will further retreat to our corners -- angry, sick, and alone."

Let us resolve to seek real connection within our communities and together weave a renewed America.

See you on the volleyball court.