Growing up the tallest girl in her middle school class, Ella Skelsey was hyper-aware of the way she looked. At 5'10, she towered over her classmates. She shopped in the women's section for school dance dresses while her classmates strolled through the junior's section. She compared herself to her volleyball and rowing teammates in high school. When she came to SMU as a freshman, Skelsey was immediately struck with the pressure to look a certain way: blonde, thin and tan. Even though she didn't fit the "SMU mold," it didn't stop her from wishing she did.

"It's always tough, wanting to look like someone else," Skelsey said.

Skelsey isn't the only one feeling the pressure. According to a National Library of Medicine study on body image satisfaction among female college students, 30% of young women surveyed reported a fair or dissatisfied perception of their body image.

The need to look a certain way isn't the only type of pressure college students face. Dr. Teona Amble, a licensed clinical psychologist in Washington, said that although some comparison is normal, social media has amplified the level of comparison among college students.

"We're not just comparing ourselves to family, friends, classmates, we're also comparing ourselves to people all over the world," Amble said. "We're in a day and age that with artificial intelligence and filters, there can be so many modifications that people can make to the image they put out."

College students are vulnerable as they solidify their identities and emerge as adults, which makes them susceptible to unrealistic, perfectionistic standards from media sources, Amble said.

This heightened vulnerability causes students to feel isolated as they grapple with the need to be perfect, whether academically, socially or athletically.

IfYou'reReadingThis at SMU tries to reduce this pressure. SMU senior Avery Zolfaghari leads the student-run organization that publishes letters discussing mental health on its website and social media. IfYou'reReadingThis publishes letters from students, faculty and alumni to make the conversation around mental health more accessible.

Zolfaghari aims to connect people through these letters. She recognizes the downsides of social media, but she said it's the most realistic way to reach college-aged students.

"If you're talking about things like body image or depression, it's so difficult," Zolfaghari said. "The letters are there for you if you want them, and if you don't want to read them, you don't have to."

SMU graduate student Raelyn Roberson's letter, "If you're reading this, you don't have to be 'perfect' all the time," was published in October 2024. Her letter was a crucial step in her healing process. Roberson struggled for years with the pressure of being a perfect athlete and student. Though she advocated for the mental health of others, she put her own on the back burner.

Roberson started running track in seventh grade, competing mainly in the high jump. Once she started breaking records and qualifying for state championships, the pressure to be perfect struck Roberson. And it's continued as she competed at SMU.

"My high school coach always used to say, 'It's not easy being great, because so many people expect things from you,'" Roberson said. "I definitely started to feel that."

Roberson said she put a lot of pressure on herself to perform well so her family would be proud.

"I thought in order for people to be proud of me, I had to be perfect, and I couldn't make any mistakes," Roberson said.

Off the track, the pressure to be academically perfect led to panic attacks that disrupted Roberson's daily life. It took therapy and conversations with her family to break down the walls the pressure had built around her. Sending a letter to IfYou'reReadingThis liberated her.

"Sometimes it takes hearing a story that someone could potentially relate to and say, 'Ok, this person that I know is going through this, and they did this, maybe that will help me too,'" Roberson said.

Though students often internalize pressure, it doesn't go unnoticed by SMU faculty and staff. Kristin Smart, former associate director of career development at SMU's Hegi Family Career Development Center and current licensed professional counselor in Dallas, said she overheard her fair share of negative self-talk from students while on campus.

Like Amble, Smart attributes the downward spiral of comparison among students to a new environment.

"It's like an intense pressure cooker in college," Smart said. "You feel this pressure to be something or make the most of yourself and you feel that competitiveness because you're only surrounded by people your own age."

While the college comparison trap has become increasingly easier to fall into, Smart emphasized it's only temporary.

Smart advises her clients -- many of whom are SMU students struggling with body image -- to stop looking at photos of themselves, throw out their scales and limit the amount of time they spend looking in the mirror. She suggests the practice of body neutrality: instead of thinking your body needs to look a certain way, try not to think about your body at all. Similarly, Amble suggests the practice of body kindness, which is to be grateful for what bodies do instead of solely focusing on appearance as a measure of self-worth.

Though Skelsey doesn't consider herself free from her body image issues, she feels she is in a better place.

"Everyone's so wrapped up in their own mind and what they think people are thinking of them that no one's actually thinking about other people and judging them. And if they are, it's probably stemming from their own insecurities," Skelsey said.